Connected listening is a way of bonding with your child. As an Audiologist and Speech Language Pathologist, and an Au-some mom (mom with a son on the Autism Spectrum), I have learned 3 Tips on how to become a connected power listener.
I help Au-some moms to shift their mindset and become powerful connected listeners to their child on the Autism Spectrum. I have learned that being a connected listener, helps me to strengthen the bond with my son and gives us both power in our relationship. Here are 3 tips on how to be a connected listener.
Reduce internal distractions
Internal distractions can capture your attention in a negative way. Reducing these distractions, when talking and listening to your child, helps you to connect. To turn down internal distractions, turn down the inner dialogue that’s within your mind. As moms, we have a lot going on in our heads (I am guilty of mind writing my grocery list or things to do list), which includes the many challenges we face every day. Reducing these mental distractions will empower me in engaging and connecting with my son. When I am distracted it becomes very hard to connect and foster your bond.
Reduce external distractions
When you manage to reduce environmental, physical and biological distractions, you are able to connect more with what your child is saying and what is important to them at that moment. This enhances your joint understanding in a simple yet beautiful way. Distractions can cause information distortion which will lead to misunderstanding. Being a good listener is not only about the physical act of hearing and sound. It’s about the aspect of listening to what else is being said and becoming in tune with your child and yourself. For example, if you are trying to speak to your boss or supervisor and they are distracted by something else, like a phone or device, would you feel that you are being completely listened to? Would it make you feel less valued and disconnected?
To be focused is to place your child as the primary and only source of information. To avoid unlimited distractions, and set aside time when nothing else becomes more important what they want to share with you. They become the target and source of information and full value is placed on their message. The ability to truly focus on listening to your child, makes them feel more valued, respected and “heard” in this big world. This is where the connection occurs. To become a connected listener we must remain focused. This increased focus will improve communication connection.
Releasing distractions (internal and external) and increasing focus will help to make you more connected with any child (especially those that are on the Autism Spectrum). Better communication is power. Successful relationships overall are greatly affected by how well you connect with others.
Have you ever felt moments when there is a break in the connection with your child (ren)? What has helped you to strengthen the connection?